Remember: people move toward pleasure; away from pain.
Sometimes I go about my life and forget that I really need appreciation my wife. I need appreciation to keep her as a friend, partner, and lover. I need to remember and offer what she needs from me. By doing this, I can create good memories within her.
You can create great memories for your partner by knowing and doing what your partner needs. Know what gives your partner the feeling of being loved and tended to. If you do this, your partner can receive what he/she really needs from you; you’ll receive the satisfaction that comes from doing something truly worthwhile. Contribute freely with no thought of return; otherwise it really doesn’t count as an act of love.
Knowing what your partner needs and wants and doing those things is what will draw your partner to you. Your partner will want to spend more time with you as a result of good memories from the past. Kind, loving acts are the glue. By themselves, appearance and sex aren’t sufficient to keep someone close to you.
Here are some more things to remember –
1. Combine truth with kindness. “A little bit of sugar helps the medicine go down.”
2. Make your word be your bond. Allow your partner to count on you.
3. Let your words be kind, clear, direct, and brief especially when voicing displeasure. It will help your partner understand what you’re trying to communicate.
4. Tolerate the opinions of your partner. You could be wrong.
5. Graciously concede when you’re wrong. DO NOT attempt to explain yourself.
6. Give up resentment and revenge. They only lead to depression, anxiety, and physical illness.
7. Make amends to your partner when you harm him/her. Be clear that you are remorseful about the harm you’ve caused.
8. Be compassionate. Feel the pain of your partner and respond. Contribute to his/her welfare. Give more than you take.
9. DO NOT be a dream killer. Allow your partner to express his/her dreams without critiquing them.
10. Evaluate your current relationship. Lower your expectations when they’re too high.
Appreciation is crucial. Be aware of the good, the true, and the beautiful. Contribute to your partner so that you’ve done something truly worthwhile for another person.