The unexamined life is not worth living. Socrates
Would you like a partner who demonstrates these attributes –
- Kindly tells the truth; isn’t deceitful even though it would be convenient.
- Doesn’t steal; respects what belongs to others.
- Courageously does what’s right even though it’s obviously hard.
- Quickly admits when he/she is wrong and makes amends as needed.
- Learns from the past and works to not repeat what’s destructive.
- Gives unconditionally love; nothing’s asked in return.
- Asks for support rather than suffering through something alone and resenting it.
- Forgives and doesn’t punish after forgiving.
- Appreciates life and looks for the good and beautiful.
- Appreciates work and works toward excellence, not perfection.
- Works for the good of the family both individually and as a whole.
- Willingly contributes to family, friends, and the larger community.
- Takes care of himself/herself and rejects being a victim.
- Treats all people with respect even though he/she has nothing to gain.
- Is the same person no matter where he/she is or who he/she is with.
- Has unchanging standards for moral behavior no matter who he/she is with.
- Is willing to be accountable to another person for what he/she thinks, says, and does. (It’ll keep you out of trouble.)
- Is able to see himself/herself, and others, with a sense of humor.
True, this is a long list of positive attributes. It’s even longer than the Ten Commandments. But, the reality is that the person you love will only want to be with you if he/she primarily associates love with you and trusts you. Therefore, the list is important. Life is short; no reruns. You and I need to do what we need to do so that we can be trusted and trusted not only by our partner but by our children and grandchildren.
Now here’s a shorter list for you. It’s a list of what not to do if you want people to stick with you. It’s a list of deal breakers. Beware of –
- Alcohol and drug abuse
- Continual arguing
- Not expressing an opinion
- Expressing opinions in a harsh, critical, derogatory manner.
- Having to have your own way
- Physical and emotional abuse
Be wise; let others play the fool and squander their life. One of the sayings in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, is “Too soon old and too late smart.” Don’t let that be true for you. Life goes by very quickly. If your partner is questioning how good a partner you are, take a good look at whether you’re someone you would want to spend the rest of your life with.
“It takes wisdom to build a house,
understanding to set it on a firm foundation;”
Proverbs 24:3, The Message